The one constant over the past three years has been change, and lots of it. You made it through the first hard pivot – isolation, then some odd “new normal,” and now you may be realizing that there is a new pivotal moment right in front of you, forcing you to evaluate where you belong now. Do you want to continue doing the things you’re doing? Should you venture out and try something new? Where do you belong? Feelings of uncertainty and an unclear picture of the future can create anxiety and make decision-making even more difficult. The first step to finding a sense of belonging requires taking a hard look at where you are right now and determining what needs to change.
Realize You Are Hardwired for Safety
Whether you realize it or not, we are all hardwired through our subconscious programming to seek safety. You may argue that nothing is safe, so this is an elusive endeavor, but we still seek safety as human beings. Predictability is a form of safety and comfort – you get up at the same time, follow the same routine, eat similar meals, and drive the same routes – that reliability creates feelings of safety and security. Changes in your life, whether forced or chosen, create discomfort.
When the discomfort gets too intense, and your sense of safety and security is threatened too much, you reach a place where something has to change. When this happens, it is natural to begin questioning where you belong, especially when it involves your job. I believe a significant aspect of the “great resignation” is that many things in life are not changeable – literally, the only thing that a lot of people have control over right now is where they work. You may not be able to change many areas in your life – family, partners, relationships, residence – but you have control over employment; it is the easiest place to make a shift, and many are making it.
Know Where You Want To Be
If this is where you find yourself, I challenge you at this moment in your journey to pause and evaluate what it means to you to achieve your ultimate goal in your career or life. Where is it that you even want to go? The answers to these questions matter because they are the key to finding where you belong. When you reach clarity on what your end goal looks like, making decisions that make you feel like you belong becomes exponentially easier. A clear picture of what you are working toward allows you to find communities where you belong and where you can push toward your goals.
You Are Never Helpless
The message here is that you are not helpless – you are never helpless – you always have choices. If you feel like you don’t belong or are in a place where you really need to reinvent yourself and do something different, start with a firm understanding of your end goal. First, set your mind clearly on the prize and the direction you want to go. With a strong sense of your starting point and your desired future, you can begin deliberately – with actionable insights and steps – to actually move toward your goal. And that is what creates the sense of belonging; when you know where you’re going and recognize that you are taking the steps needed to get there, it creates that sense of safety. This sense of belonging and security is based on you creating that feeling within yourself – you controlling your future – and it is no longer determined by anything external.
At the Growth Architect, your growth is at the height of importance, and our goal is to help you reach your full potential. If you want to learn more about making decisions about change and belongingness, watch my video on discovering where you belong.
Beate Chelette is The Growth Architect & Founder of The Women’s Code, a training company specialized in providing companies an ROI on Balanced Leadership. She has been named one of 50 must-follow women entrepreneurs by the Huffington Post. A first-generation immigrant who found herself $135,000 in debt as a single parent, she bootstrapped her passion for photography into a highly successful global business and eventually sold it to Bill Gates in a multimillion-dollar deal.
Beate works with business leaders and supports organizations by developing and providing training the training, tools, and expertise to create and maintain a balanced, equal, and inclusive work environment that fosters creativity, employee engagement, and corporate growth.
Recent clients include Merck, Women’s Legislative Caucus of California, Cal State University Dominguez Hills, Small Business Development Centers (SBDC), NFTE, CreativeLive, the Association of Corporate Growth, and TracyLocke.
Beate is the author of the #1 International Amazon Bestseller “Happy Woman Happy World – How to Go From Overwhelmed to Awesome” a book that corporate trainer and best-selling author Brian Tracy calls “a handbook for every woman who wants health, success and a fulfilling career.
To book Beate to speak or train please connect here. Your Time Is Valuable!