Another podcast interview and another pointed comment. My male host, Pablo, asked if men need to be worried when they hear the future is female. Well, of course NOT! What’s important to understand is the difference between the lip service and what is actually happening when it comes to women’s advancement.
The Reality
- THE NUMBERS ARE NOT GOOD. No matter how many times you hear about female advancement on the news or read about it, the numbers are NOT changing. There are a few companies that are making inroads when it comes to gender pay parity and equality at their workplaces (Salesforce being one of them, and they glow in the spotlight). The top workplaces for women and working mothers to be employed are also widely documented. And that’s it. That’s the summation of the progress we have made.
- MEN CONTINUE TO PUSH BACK ON WOMEN’S DEMANDS. Women are called unreasonable, dumber (because our brains are smaller), inferior, not committed, distracting, and not as qualified. All this backlash over women asking for something that is pretty rudimentary. Women don’t want to be punished for being mothers. We do want equal treatment that addresses women’s issues. Not the issues of men—that’s a different set of issues. As a result, not much is happening. We are spinning in circles.
- WOMEN FAIL TO COLLABORATE WITH EACH OTHER. This means that we are not well organized to ask for what we need. Infighting amongst women—accentuated by She Tyrants and Queen Bees—is alive and well. Just because you know one woman who has figured it out doesn’t move the needle. Young women think older women (like me) are feminists, and while they often don’t know what that term means they are adamantly against it. After all, it’s we who have these issues, not them. Give it time, I say. It’s easy to overlook the issues when you haven’t yet experienced the glass ceiling, or discrimination against mothers, or the horrible guilt you feel when you have to juggle both your sick child and your job.
- ORGANIZATIONS ARE FOCUSED ON OPERATIONS AND PROFITS. A company will make changes when it is mandated (i.e. forced). Despite the hundreds of thousands of dollars forked out to pay damages and fines for sexual harassment charges (including one case where the company was ordered to pay a 1.6 million dollar settlement because the company knew but didn’t do anything about it), many companies believe a two-hour online harassment training will do the trick. Wait, you think that a $3000 program will do a good enough job over two hours delivered every two years for you to limit your exposure to these massive settlements? Think again. Organizations also don’t seem to understand how to find and hire women. That’s why I wrote an article about it.
- ON THE POLITICAL FRONT, WE STILL HAVE MEN WHO ARE DECIDING WHAT WOMEN SHOULD DO. What our health programs and care programs should look like, what we should be covered for, and what we can do with our bodies. How a man can say that a woman’s visit to her OB/GYN is “extra care” and not the standard care, or that birth control can’t be covered, is so caveman that it leaves me speechless every single time. Women need to be in charge of deciding what care we need. We keep rehashing the exact same issues again and again. There is so much time wasted that I’d like to fire them all for failing.
The Future is Female
The future is female because we are at a point in history where the question women have is simple: “Can you see who I am?”
Why do we have to beg for things that we shouldn’t have to ask for, like equality in every area of our lives and the right to make our own decisions?
The future is female because men built the systems and the systems are failing women. Women are now ready to step up because our trust has been eroded.
While we’ve been pro men all along because we love our men, we have now run out of patience. No more waiting.
The future is female because men make the majority of decisions in a system that works for them, and that has no allocated room for women. Why do we feel bad for being a woman?
See us for who we are. Women are not men. I repeat, women are not men. We do not need the same things as men. We want something equivalent that works for us. It has to be created now.
The future is female because women are so fed up that we’re exploding. If we see one more image of a roomful of men deciding on healthcare for women, we will explode.
If we see one more comment on locker room banter… If we hear one more excuse for why something can’t be done because it would be an unfair advantage for women, like time off to give birth and care for a newborn… If we hear one more time that because we took a year off our entire education is worthless… ENOUGH!
The future is female because most male decision makers have failed to understand that there is a difference between men and women.
They don’t understand that just because we want equality, we don’t want to be treated like men. We want to be treated like women. And just saying that is setting off men crying unfair. At the same time, men are upset that women are asking for what men have! Wait, which one is it going to be?
Because of snail-like pace that systems are moving in, women have no choice but to step up. And when women organize it is an earth-shattering event. If you still don’t hear us, we’ll do it again and again until we have it figured out.
The answer—and I have been standing on my soapbox shouting it out loudly—is very simple. Let men be men and let women be women. Give each what each needs, as long as it is the equivalent. THAT’S BALANCE. That’s what we should aim for.
If you like to listen to the podcast interview in Pablo’s segment of the Small Business War Stories – check it out in the link below. Here we talked about community, supporting one another, the realities of starting a business, and much more.
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If you’d like to book Beate as a speaker on New Leadership Balance or Creative Entrepreneurship for your next event please connect with me.
I will support “the future is female” slogan when I see all-female construction crews, all female sewer maintenance crews, electricians, road construction crews, miners, entire combat brigades, or anything else that is a grungy, dirty job that is not a glam STEM job.
If you believe the equality means sameness or that physical strengths (even though it’s clear that female and male bodies are different) are the criteria – you may have a point. This inflammatory MGTOW rhetoric is pointless because most men don’t work in sewers or build roads. So it is ok for you to take credit and ride on the coattails for those who actually build the roads but not for women? There is no logic in this. None. Zero. Zilch.
If that’s your logic, then men deserve more as they bring more body strength that makes everyone’s life easier, i bet the house you are living in must be build by a man. The internet(world wide web), electricity, bulbs, cars, majority of the vaccines etc were invented by men that is making lives easy for everyone. You have no problem in consuming things and when crises happens like tornadoes, floods, earthquakes, terrorist attacks we don’t find people like you saving life by risking theirs, instead people like you take credits for the work done by other female care workers. You are just an ungrateful opportunist dividing people using your dirty gender politics. what this video from a Female CEO who doesn’t want to hire female employs https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A75r7cXQMds. I myself as a asian origin female from STEM field agree with her, we as asain women earning after more that the women in the west as per statistics as well, you know the reason ? its simple we work hard and earn our positions instead of playing victim cards.
You are entitled to your opinion. Men can’t give birth. So under your logic women deserve more because without us there would be no men? And why that tone? Can’t you have this conversation without that sharpness? Are men really more in your opinion?
Women can’t give birth alone, without the sperms a woman’s eggs are useless and body gets rid of it during periods.Each cell in human body has 46 chromosomes or you can say 23 pair of chromosomes, 23 chromosomes comes from egg and 23 from sperm and that’s how babies are born. That’s basic biology 101 please have some education in basic biology, and for your point without women there would be no men inverse is also true without men there would be women as well. That’s why we compliment each other. If giving birth was the ultimate thing then animals would have been on the top of food chain and that is clearly not the case. When a women gets pregnant she is in the most vulnerable state needs protection that’s where men comes in and takes the responsibility of protecting the family. I am very fortunate enough to have great dad, uncles and grandfather who raised and protected me along with my mother, aunts and Grandma and they ensured women in our family have their all needs fulfilled, that why i care about MEN without their sacrifices and hardships i would not be in the current position where i am right now. I am fortunate enough to have such a great family that’s how my life is and i care more about them than cats cuz they will be on my side on bad time comes not cats.
Glad to hear that you have such great role models. If what you describe would exist in larger numbers we all can benefit.
“Men can’t give birth.” Ah yes, typical second wave feminist’s rhetoric that has been abused SO much to the point it is not even REMOTELY persuasive anymore.
This underlying premise from these “female chauvinism” that “females are superior because they create lives, while males are inferior because they only know how to make nuclear bombs and kill everybody,” hasn’t really changed much since the second Terminator movie has it?
Let me introduce you to a biological term called “male mutation bias,” also called as “male driven evolution”. What this basically means is that since males produce significantly more reproductive cells(sperm cells) than females(egg cells), they create more mutations and drive genetic diversity/evolution.
People severely take this for granted simply because it is not as apparent and tangible as female labor. Humanity could not have existed without males driving evolution and providing sufficient genetic diversity. So, using the same logic as yours I can confidently say that without male humans female humans would not have survived this far.
No, I do not think men are more in my opinion. I just wanted get some facts straight. This constant self contradictory claims; preaching gender equality while at the same time preaching preaching greater biological importance of females compared to males are outdated, scientifically debunked myths that need to die out.
Basically feminists want superiority not equality. They want all women’s disadvantages righted but men’s disadvantages to remain. Thus positive discrimination for women and yet divorce courts are criminally pro women. Efforts to help boys struggling in education are strongly resisted by women’s groups. Women use their voting power to get their demands. I’m not pro men but I want to see more equal treatment by society and women for men. Women need to change too in their expectations of men not just the other way round.
Think before you say something like Erica. No sperm no pregnancy. It’s a childish argument to bring that up in the first place. It reinforces my belief that most feminists really hate men really despite denying it. Most women and men have more pressing things like surviving day to day and Climate Change to really think too much about gender fight. Yes FIGHT
I’m assuming your a male.
I mean this in the nicest way. Your mother is the most powerful woman in your life or you wouldn’t be here. The femininity that brought you into this world is stronger then pulling or pushing any plumbing, electrical, or any pipe you speak of. I know this because as a woman I have “Labored” in both. (I don’t believe in war(which is definitely man made) I know for a fact you have not done both.
I agree with this article. Equal as in YIN has equal value as YANG. We were Yang dominant for so long it was crushing women, killing the planet and harming animals. In Chinese philosophy, the I Ching hexagram for peace is Yin above Yang, which means the masculine has to support the feminine, which includes mother earth, not exhaust it and use it until it is plundered and can’t regenerate. The feminine also has to hold down the masculine so it doesn’t rise in a way that is harmful.
Thank you Krisztina for sharing this. I love that the Yin is above the Yang and that masculine supports the feminine. I may just use that in my next presentation…
I stumbled across this article while I was searching for the meaning behind the slogan “Future is female”. I thought I would find some explanation. All I seem to find here is an essay on the inequalities today, and why this must be changed. But it doesn’t talk about what happens in this envisioned future where all is female.
What point are you trying to drive? Would you not want men to be your allies? Believe me, there are some of us who are empathetic to your cause. Why make slogans that alienate men? The same goes with naming the movement as “feminism”. If male-domination is what we all hate and want to combat, why come up with banners and slogans which suggest female domination?
There’s a lot to discuss here. The term feminism isn’t as if we are naming a movement now. This has been around for 50 years. I tend to not change the term’s meaning. It means it its most simplistic form: equal opportunity and equal rights. Nobody should have an issue with that. The future is female doesn’t mean that there is female domination it means that the female side of everything is what is missing and on the up and up. During the global crisis you see that female centric leadership like empathy, community and collaboration are critical for a leader to posses. That is the point. Hope this helps.
What’s wrong is the title of this blog “The future is female” The future should not be female or male it should be the future is parity. Why? Because when men and women, women and men work together the strengths of each gender will compensate for the weaknesses in the other because science when examining masculine and famine traits have found that each gender is stronger where the other gender is weakest. This means that when women and men are working together the strengths of each gender will compensate for the weaknesses in the other.
Therefor neither a patriarchy or matriarchy be.
Lets hear it for America a parity Nation.
Problem here is that there siting stuff like gender pay gap which is proven to be to complex of a calculation to assess.
Boys and Men are brainwashed into collective narcissism by patriarchal values and ideologies through numerous religions and cultures. The collective narcissism amongst men and boys needs to be dismantled in order to achieve an egalitarian society. I am angry and devastated at what women and girls go through across the world, and I am deeply ashamed to be a part of the demographic that has historically oppressed and dehumanized them, and I am deeply ashamed of the destruction men have inflicted onto the world. I look forward to the day where all men and boys (and everyone, really) respects all women and girls equally. But in this day and age, that is not the case. And it probably won’t be the case for a very, very long time.
-Signed an American Man
Well, not all men are narcissists or brainwashed. There is good and bad on both sides. Communication and a deep understanding of each other is the key to achieving what equal means like. Not all men like the current structure and not all women hate it, which makes it so difficult to find consensus.
Thanks for the read,it was interesting.
What did you take away Emily?
Hey so I hear this saying a little and I can’t help but feel a bit bad about it; I think a majority of it is me just being a young boy. But it just makes me feel somewhat alienated, I know it’s not supposed to as you said “While we’ve been pro men all along because we love our men…” is there a way to change or at least help my outlook on the “future is female” saying or is it just something I’m gonna have to deal with?
I wished I had a good answer for you other than the world is not fair and it is not just. Women are by the role nature assigned the gender that is responsible for child bearing and caring. The role of men is the the role nature assigned the provider and defender. Neither role is as clear cut as it used to be. Women often chose and often have to work, few men bring in enough money to support an entire family. With the roles having changed there is confusion. The question arises is – what is it supposed to be? Does one work better than the other? The answer is – I don’t know. And we are frankly way beyond that. But human nature is that we seek to fault someone else for something that is happening to us because taking responsibility is difficult for most people. And that means only one thing, they get increasingly bitter and frustrated. I think your comment shows that you are thoughtful which I can’t say about the just sheer hatred I have received for being outspoken about wanting the same rights as men. Now when I work with my clients I always ask first: what is it that you want? My daughter who just had a baby doesn’t want to be the main breadwinner she wants to be a mom. I didn’t have that option. It wasn’t until later in life that I found a partner who wanted a strong woman by choice. I wanted a strong alpha because even so I am definitely an alpha woman I don’t want to live in alpha every moment of my life. So the answer I have for you is simple. There is no scenario in which women will take over the world even though a fringe movement of very angry men wants you to believe that which is why women’s rights are assaulted. Rather I encourage you to look at the data that shows what the real numbers are. We do not live in an equal society. Imagine the Texas Supreme court telling you what you can do with your body? For women a reality. That we have to fight. What we don’t fight is our humanity and love for each other. Women need and want men and men want and need women. Anyone saying something different is fooling themselves unless they chose loneliness. And that I don’t recommend. My advice, go out more – read less of the woman or men hating rubbish. The truth as always is in the middle. It is the balance we seek. I hope this helps.